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It is Probably About Time to Grow The Fuck Up

The topics I discuss on My Journey to Millions range from estate planning to myheated rants and despite being passionate about a lot of the issues I discuss, I try to keep this blog professional.  Notwithstanding, you can probably guess from my title I read an article today that actually made me want to throw my computer out the window.  I came across this article on Huffington Post titled, “I Love My Job, But it Made me Poorer” by JD Samson.

Oddly enough, Ms. Samson starts the article discussing how unemployable she is

I’m 33 years old and I can’t make coffee. I don’t know how to use Excel, or bartend, or wait tables, and I’m officially too old to join the police force. I’ve lost the confidence to go back to school and feel stressed out about impending debt when I think about further education for even one second.

While she seems to be proficient in the music scene (I have never heard of her group but I am no where near the cool scene when it comes to music despite only being 30) she, by her own admission, is completely unemployable in traditional sense of the word.  But this is her problem, so why did this article affect me so much?

Not Everyone Can Live Their Dreams Grow The Fuck Up

I can pinpoint 2 specific quotes from Ms. Samson that made my skin crawl with legitimate anger,

…it was easier to rent to a rich, trust-fund, straight-guy banker who wants to live in the coolest borough in the world?  Because when he met me he saw a tattooed gender outlaw who makes “queer electronic punk music” and isn’t sure when the next check is going to come in? Yeah, I don’t blame him. He doesn’t give a shit about how kids email me all the time thanking me for keeping them from committing suicide. It’s not part of his capitalist business practice.

Get off your God Damn high horse.  This landlord probably has to pay the bank, and definitely the City of New York and the State of New York for the privilege to own that “capitalist business practice.” Sorry he should probably tell those three very formidable business partners, “Hey she is a really nice person with some cool ink and trendy music that won’t likely be relevant in 20 some odd years, but who cares if she may not be able to pay her rent.”

I know the banker is a metaphor but how the hell do you know if that banker is gay? or if that banker worked at nights to get through college? Just because he shows up to a business meeting dressed appropriately (i.e. no rings hanging out of one’s lip doesn’t make him part of the establishment, man) You don’t…you just know that he got an apartment you clearly couldn’t qualify for.

The Second quote is even worse:

So I have to ask myself: where did I go wrong? And I can only guess that the answer lies in a combinations of three things: 1) my family is not rich, 2) I am a queer woman, and 3) I am trying so desperately to keep up with my peers that I am living beyond my means.

Holy shit! Ms. Samson is so delusional that it takes 2 additional steps before she gets to the fact that she is living beyond her means.  She has so much self pity that she first has to say that her family isn’t rich and for the 5th time in a 500 word article mention that she is a lesbian before getting to one half of the problem she is trying to keep up the Jonses albeit a much more cash infused new talent version of the Jonses.

Giving up her career barely crosses her radar in her article, well Ms. Samson, this leads us to the other half of the problem?  Like I said to begin with GROW UP!

Like so many teenagers, I believed in the “American Dream,” that I could move to New York from the Midwest and become an artist. I would achieve both fame and success, and I would never have to think about money.




  1. Well said.

    If she wants to do something useful, she can like….um…actually get off her butt and make an effort instead of blaming her failures on others.

  2. ROFLMAO!!! Oh, hell yeah..You nailed that right on the head. What is it with this entitled generation of nobody’s that think the American Dream is some sort of inheritance ? IT IS A DREAM, IDIOT – You still have to do the WORK to make it happen! My son is a 21 year old musician that knows, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that he still has to keep a J-O-B to fund his passion. Not only does this tool of a woman need to figure out how to get an apartment, she needs to put on her big girl pants, learn to make her OWN coffee and get a CLUE. Build a bridge, you pansy and GTF over it. GAWD!

  3. What’s extra pathetic about this is that someone gave her enough credibility to publish her whining, which is typical for the Huffington Post. As a parent of four kids, them turning out to be this chick is my greatest nightmare. What has happened to personal accountability?

  4. Tell us how you really feel. Haha.

    This attitude is why this country is struggling. You know I was actually doing research the other day to try to find out if there is another country in the world that aligns closer to my personal values. Growing up, I never thought America would become a place where an ambitious hard-worker doesn’t fit in. It’s very sad.

  5. Awesome – I was also smacked by her entitlement. Woe is me because i’m queer. FALSE. You’re broke and have no marketable skills because you didnt work on any marketable skills. I know plenty of gay people that know how to make coffee and wait tables – why dont you? Oh, you werent trying.
    Also, it’s nice to know that you’re sorta like everyone else (but better, because you’re gay) in that you’re spending money on meals out and drinks out that you cant afford. My suggestion is to stop doing that, and you would be able to save for your retirement.

  6. Oh Evan, you know how much I love a good rant. I hear people like this all the time. I think that my mom refers to them as my family.

    Work is a 4 letter word for them and they THINK that they should have everything in the world just because they breathe. I have never understood that and still don’t now.

    And her being “queer” has nothing to do with it. It’s her being LAZY.

  7. Nice job! Chasing dreams are nice, but there needs to be a dose of reality somewhere, sometime, right? People have a hard time changing their routine. Her dream chasing is her routine. Now it’s an excuse and a nightmare. On a side note, it stuns me that this person gets published on Huffingon Post. Maybe I should work on fantasyland excuses and my dream sob story!

  8. Personal responsibility has nothing to do with age, although it should. Certain dreams that require artistic skills seem to attract a certain kind of individual. They may be more childlike or maybe immature. The mature or responsible thing to do is to have a Plan B.

  9. I wonder if this article pissed you off a bit? Can’t really tell. LOL…..she definitely has an issue taking responsibility for her situation.

    I applaud her for going after her dream and sticking with it this long, but she needs to make some simple choices.

    1) Dial back her expenses
    2) Get a day job or part time job
    3) Continue to follow her dream

    Has nothing to do with the banker, being gay (last I check the gay community is one of the most affluent in this country), or her parents being rich (if they were, more than likely they wouldn’t just feed her money).

    Grow the fuck up, young lady!

  10. It’s really mean of that landlord not to give her an apartment if she can’t pay the rent. Everyone should be her daddy and just take care of her. How dare that guy with an actual job have a place to live.

    Funny that the skills she lists at the begining that she does not have would only take about a week to learn if she put her mind to it.

  11. Music lessons as a profession? Become a teacher? Take a bartending lesson, that might be fun. Music management. I can think of a couple options for her already.

  12. Everyone’s comments are great. No need to repeat. This type of person drives me nuts! She has the attitude that society owes her a job, and success is a “right.” Unfortunately too many parents make it too easy for their kids to coast through life, they never learn how to make their own success without any help. Like many idiots with dreams, this girl decided to move to the most expensive place in the country and then complains when she can’t make it work. Here’s a brilliant idea: move to a city where you can actually afford a reasonable quality of life, and try to find a new career path. Oh and stop leading with the “queer” foot…

  13. Great post Evan! I could imagine you screaming this at the poor delusional person.

    “Holy shit! Ms. Samson is so delusional that it takes 2 additional steps before she gets to the fact that she is living beyond her means.”

  14. O.M.G. — you are SO right – this girl seriously needs to grow up and quit whining. Things are tough all over and we can either pull ourselves up by the bootstraps or we can blame everyone in the world except the person in the mirror.

    I seriously think my 17 year old who is currently afflicted with a bad case of “senioritis” and therefore thought she could coast her senior year, has a better handle on the real world than this infantile “adult”.

  15. The worst part of it is that there are so many more out there but they just aren’t given the platform to vocalize it. And, worse than that is that many are getting some kind of gov’t subsity to support the it. I have known some.

  16. This person just sounds whiny and probably isn’t very good at her music.

    If she really hustled to make a music career she would have developed a TON of marketable skills along the way. Being in a band is like running your own business. You don’t just play music. You have to be organized; be a marketer; be a manager; practice your ass off; network; and be able to solve problems on the fly (think the movie Spinal Tap, which is closer to the truth than many know). Writing great music helps too.

    I’m all for following your dreams. And I also know that I didn’t make it as a musician because I didn’t put the right kind of work into it, not because “the man” had it out for me.

    Great bands make it because of the work they put in, period. Just like any business.

  17. Completely agree. She needs to get out of her delusional world and get a real job. She’s probably too busy occupying Wall Street right now though. It’s obvious she doesn’t like bankers.

  18. Ironically the principles of financial management would help her be more successful. If you look at groups who have been around since the beginning of time such as the Rolling Stones… Mick Jagger went to the London School of Education. Someone has to make sure taxes are paid and no one steals the money

    My mother in law is an artist and like many artists, financial success is considered selling out and discussion of money in relation to the arts is too gauche for words. She’s in her 70’s now and lives on a pension of $800 per month.

    I have met many very skilled artists and tradesmen and unfortunately your success will mostly come after lots of hard work if you manage your money well enough to still be in the business. Without learning business and personal finance skills, long term there is no hope for you.

  19. Coffee ain’t hard to make. Excel ain’t hard to learn. Waiting tables ain’t hard to do. Ughhhh come on woman! He probably didn’t want to rent to you because you make excuses for everything. Your parents aren’t rich? Well neither are most of the people on the billionaires list. GROW UP! Or not, it’s your choice. Just don’t blame life not giving you hand outs on you being a lesbian. I know a bunch of lesbians who make coffee, use Excel, and can probably wait tables at the same time. You’re just lazy ma’am, and we’re not sympathetic. AH! Thanks for the rant Evan.

  20. I wonder how she managed to run her own band without any marketable skills. Here in LA there are a lot of small (and talented) artists who are struggling. But they all have a lot of marketing skills. Book-keeping for the bands, designing promotional flyers, networking, marketing… I am sure if they really wants to work, she can… its just she might not be willing to do anything other than playing. At the very least I am sure she can tutor and earn money from that…

  21. This comment on the site hit the nail on the head:

    “As a gay artist myself, actually hanging out in the same circles as JD, I can relate, but there comes a time, I guess when I turned 38, that you start to realize that the world is not against you. You are the world. Our greatest enemy is our own fears, prejudices­, jealousies­, desires. If you want to make money there are endless possibilities out there. If you don’t want to work, there are food stamps. And who pays for the food stamps? The rich people’s taxes. It’s important to question the world, but not as important as questioning your own thoughts.”

  22. Yeah… get a part time job so you can pay your rent until you hit the big time. Are you saying Beyonce and other big stars never waited a table? Everyone has got to pay their due, stop complaining and do something about it.

  23. When I first started college I loved oil painting and music. The only problem is that I kind of sucked at both. There is a reason the phrase “starving artist” is so common in our vernacular.

    So at the age of 18 I made up my mind I would still paint and write music but it would be a hobby, not a profession.

    Most art types don’t realize how hard professional artists work and how good they are at what they do. Most of these slackers think because they they have an interest in art they don’t have to work. My friends that are professional artists worked 60 hours a week on their craft. This lady in the article spends that much time making excuses instead of working.

  24. Lol, love the rant, Evan! She may be disappointed that life isn’t as easy as she expected it to be, but time for her to start changing things instead of blaming others that had nothing to do with her predicament. Living within one’s means would be a good start!

  25. Hahaha. That is brilliant. Sadly, there are tons of people who live in this alternate reality where the world is against them.

  26. OMG…if this we’re a barista I’d say it sounds JUST like my 23 YO daughters rant!! We raised her to have personal responsibility, morals and a commitment to others but as kids spend more of their day with their friends at school, she chose the path MOST of her friends also chose and blames the world for her problems. She’s cut ties with us since we won’t cower to her demands…her loss, and our wallets gain!! Sorry world, we tried our best with her 🙂 She can sink or swim on her own now.

  27. Why is it most young people think they’re going to be an artist,musician,poet,writer,actor,ect.ect.Most of the people in this world are nobodys and that is a fact.There are plenty of nothing jobs for people that don’t have marketable skills or an education.Just get used to saying “would you like fries with that” and you’ll be alright.Looking for someone to blame for your plight is a sign of immaturity,you’re not special no matter what your mommie told you.Blacks used to have a saying…”stick it to the man”,now that the man is black,they don’t know what to do.If you’re over 25 and still living with your parents,sitting on the couch eating doritos,you’re a total loser.If you find gainful employment,you won’t start at the top.But you do have one thing on your side,you have nowhere to go but up.

  28. This reminds me of the girl probably around this same time that had graduated from some private college with $200k in student loan debt and she was complaining how she couldn’t afford the debt and had started a website for people to donate to her to help her pay the debt. Know what her major and career path was? Social worker. That’s just ridiculous. I’m pretty sure she was going to live in the NE and Payscale has the salary now at $48k for median across the entire social work industry. Starting closer to $30k. How are you going to be able to pay the debt off before it’s time to even retire, especially living in the NE where the cost of living is crazy high. It boggles my mind that people were actually giving her money for her stupid decisions.


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